Scumbase

Out of the bowels of the bilge emerges what remains of a small goblin. Broken, ragged nails scabble at the floor, dragging the shabby remnants of our intrepid reporter slowly over to the bar, pausing only to briefly look up Ciciz's skirt as Nargoth sends her scurrying about. Clawing up the legs of a bar stool that looks suspiciously like a highchair, Alyxyn finally drops heavily into his seat, only to be belted in tightly by Revliss using extra strength ducttape. Dropping a fuzzy, red, sodden mass onto the bar, Alyxyn throws back his head to belch loud enough to awaken Dolgan and scare rats two building away.

"Oooooooooo mah head, mah po widdle head," the greener-than-normal menace moans softly. Working to try to focus on his hands, he whispers "quick... ah pen und sum papah afur Gboss wakez up 'gain."

With such words of sage wisdom, does the Foul Green Bilgedweller begin to, once again, issue forth the latest edition:

"welcum welcum welcum to de aftermath o' da Fez-tival. While ah waits fer mah fez ta dry out a bit, and tanx tah da guiding boot uf da Gboss as he returned, ahm here tah let ya know... oy! wotta Fez-tival."

With the heftah flow o' brew, scum continued ta level but still averaging abouts da same az always, 'round 2 lebels dis week. However, at least one, Magnumpower, got 5 level while Jmardo und Wordplay scored 3 apiece which is prettah danged good iffen ya asks me. Yup. Nargipoo iz back tah bein "average scum" too. Nice tah be spotlighted, ain't it Nargi?

Unfortunately summa de uthah guilds haf been growin und recruitin. Dis, combined wit Scum apparnetly too busy wit da booze tah click in, haz resulted in us slippin down ta third place. Itz gud ta see dat we kin get 'perience wit summa our fights now but we needsta be winning morah dem. Losing iz not wot we iz scum fer. GBoss was sad when he dun seen summa our recent click ins und is threatening sum more whippings, iffen not plank walkins.

Diz said, least we gots us sum pipple werkin on dere gladiatorial asperashuns (hah! hadda sneak in a 5 gold piece word somewhar). Quilp has been popping upta numbah 1 at times to be furiously beaten back down but MagnumPower actually managed ta raise 25 rankings to be 39th ranked oberall. How iz dat fer some tail kickins? Other 'spiring perfermances were seen outa Rizzo34 that raised 20 ranks, Valind wit 19 und Koshka wit 17. At da highest ranks we keep seeing heavy shifting around with Iola being her feisty self, Bain and FlyingJoe turning in reliable performances and Ninastare and Dolgan well in da running.

In our stampbook collections we's got some problems yet in ahr ranks. Two scum remain trapped down in da sub 50% level n Gboss will likely start practicin wit dat new buffalo hide 12 foot bullwhip he broughts back wit him. 10 more scum are between 50 and 75% complete. Franklah dis surprises mah. Iffen ya spends time onnit, da stampbook goez fazt un ya gets arena victories towards yer kills awards un builds yer exp bonus. Dis iz a definite win-win so why aintcha tending it? Ahd rillah liketah know. Drop me a line in da bilge bouts it?

Well datz it fer dis week, lessen summon can tell me how tah get a stain offa mah footsies. It seems dat ah dun stepped in a Glomph sumtime last week. *sigh* Stings un looks funny on mah green skin.