Sunday, March 11, 2012

Birthday Bashes & More (10 March)


Valley of Awful XP
Condolences to you scum. For you have reached an epic level, but will have to beat many dungeons to get out of this XP valley.
· 300 - Ninastar
· 225 - Oswalt

Nice Round Numbers
Congratulations to you scum, your level looks nice and round.
· 270 - Gregor Clegane
· 230 - Zot, Melange
· 210 - Valind, Bakryu
New members 95% Club
You almost maxed out your scrapbook. You are truly making advantage of it the most now.
· Parrish
Random Data of the Week
Something important to get you through the week
· Average Scrapbook - 91.08%
· Highest Scrapbook: Quilp, Bain - 99.18%
· Biggest Jump this week: Keldonhing - 11.82%
· Impressive Jumps this week: Zimmi, Crusaderbin, Parrish, Ahkdar, Farkentje
· Scum below 75% Scrapbook - 5
· Scum above 95% Scrapbook - 29

EDIT: Oh and enjoy this jewel we found in Kami's stats last week...


Saturday, March 10, 2012

The Festival Edition (Paaspop)


In a couple of weeks the first Festival of the year, Paaspop in Schijndel, opens their gates again. And of course I’m going to be there. Why? Because it is FUN! Yes, that is right, good music, beer, bad food and hopefully good weather is my idea of fun!

I noticed a lot of you lowlifes have an opinion about music and about the bands that pretend to play that music. Some of usefull opinions, some not so usefull opinions, but always entertaining. So i figured it might be time for an experiment: "Music to Die for, the Festival Edition".

I present to you "The List". A list of all the bands that are announced to play at Paaspop so far. So tell me scum... Which band should I go see and why?


Accept * Agoria * Akkachar * Ali B * Aya * Bassjackers * Bingo Players * Black-Bone * Blaudzun * Bliksem * Blondt * Bobby Burns * Boer zoekt feest * Brutuzz * Budzillus * Bunga Bunga * BZB Into Folkrock * Candybar Planet * Case Mayfield * Chagall * Chef'Special * Chris Liebing * Cinnaman * Conforce * Crazy Piano's * Dannic * De Dijk * De Heideroosjes * De Heren van Holland Hard * De Kraaien * De Theo's * Dearworld * Death Before Dishonor * Delivio Reavon & Aaron Gill * Dion Cassius * Di-rect * DJ Baco Pirelli * DJ Erick E * DJ FS Green * DJ Hardwell * DJ Harry & The Harken * DJ Hatcha * Dj Joost van Bellen * DJ Kutz * DJ Maarten * DJ Nicekens * DJ Ralee * DJ Roog * Dotan * Drop the Lime * Duo Penaughty * Emalkay * Enge Buren * Enslaved * Extince * Feest DJ Ruud * Finntroll * Flowfabriek * Foxy Lady ft. Darty * Funkerman * Gers Pardoel * Golden Earring * Gomes * Guus Meeuwis * Hardrockkaraoke * Hell * Henk Wijngaard * Hoezo luste gij ginne koffie * House of Cash * In Flames * It Takes Two * Jakes * Jaz von D * Joey Suki * Jungle By Night * Just Pitto * Kane * Karma To Burn * Kensington * Klaas van der Eerden * Korpiklaani * Kraantje Pappie * Kubus & Rico * La Fuente * La Kinky Beat * Lefties Soul Connection * Leon van der Zanden * Lijn 7 * Loco Loco Discoshow * Lucien Foort * Mala Vita * Mauro Picotto * MC Apster * MC Crazy D * MC Gee * Meester Moeilijk & Sjonnie Disco * Memphis Maniacs * Michael Mendoza * Mike Mago * Mr Polska * Nobody Beats The Drum * Note To Amy * Orgel Vreten * Paul Zerdin * Per.verz * Peter Pan Speedrock * Piro * Pulled Apart By Horses * PureSang * PYT * R3hab * Racoon * Radio De Roze Panter * Rina Mushonga * Riptide * Rival Sons * Rowwen Heze * Sandro Silva * School Is Cool * Selah Sue * Sick Individuals * Simian Mobile Disco * Skip & Die * Soul Sinners * Splendid * Spoetnik Orkestar * Steve Aoki * Steve Rachmad * Sticks & A.R.T. * Tasjesdisco ft. Mr Fox * Terror * Textures * The Backcorner Boogie Band * The Devil's Blood * The Inspector Cluzo * The Kyteman Orchestra * The Legendary Shack Shakers * The Magician * The Mahones * The Pine Box Boys * The Subs * The Umbilical Brothers * The Wombats * Timmietex * Triggerfinger * Trolley Snatcha * Trolest * Truckersbal * Vanderbuyst * Villa * Will And The People * Within Temptation * Woendale

Friday, March 09, 2012


Three weeks in a row? This can not be happening, there is too much joy coming our of my pores, I have to go to the toilet for a rainbow throw-up, four-leaf clovers are popping out of my Lucky Charms! Is this level of ecstasy even allowed in these mortals realms?

Yes, my friend, it is, as I present to you, for the third week in a row, Soundcheck! Now you actually have to know that for me, at the present time in Japan, it is presently 2:15am on March 7th. In other terms, wayy to early for my column. But is happens that tonight, is a great night!

In a nutshell, I have :

  • been contacted by a relatively known translation company in the world
  • found 5 new private English students
  • found a supervisor and place to do my Canadian University exam
  • possibly fixed my VISA problem (will be vague until later this week)
  • reconciled the relationship with the girlfriend pretty much back to normal and therefore am very happy.
To be fair, I am:

  • drunk on a pineapples/lemons/35%-alcohol/two-year-old home-made thingy that was in the back of my fridge
  • relatively 'tilted' from a good and safe source of 'enjoyment'
  • begged to write this column right now by Ghetto (hey, what can you do, I whine, he begs, make your pick)

I intend to let this be whatever it comes out to be, no alteration done!
So let's do this!!

This week, we receive on our boards someone who's sense of humor is underestimated. We have been making fun of him for quite a while here and there and never has he shown a sign of "all-right people, enough now". He took and still takes it all like a man, he's been flooding our chat with crap, he has earned the right to laugh about our Dear Lord Ghetto the Manslayer himself, that's right, here's your man, Morhdd!

The song is on the rhythm of Happy Birthday to You!
And then I realized, it ends with orhdd and I am completely screwed!
Screw you Ghetto!!!!
So I go back to the Guild Chat and ask him: how do you pronounce "Morhdd" and he says "how do I know kami (with no capitals)... more harddiskdrives?"
And Nargoth answers : "Bored"
And ensues a list of none-sense ending with weird sounds that more-or-less sound like 'ord'.......
...
FINE, watch the drunken art!

It is your turn, dear Morhdd,
You made Nargoth so bored!
You can't afford
Dodging my word,

Please don't feel like a turd.
Because as a completely drunk person under the influence of Ghetto, that is not my goal!

Blame the Lord on that one! ... Hey, "lord" could have fit in that song!! Oh well, too late...

And so, we embark on the magical ride that is Morhdd's conception. Now I have to admit, I watched this song to see if it would inspire me into writing something. Boy, did it!! This is gold!! I must have heard this song once or twice before, maximum, and it is PRICELESS with the video! Watch, my friends, as Jack and Diane are just DYING for each other!!

 

WOW! I can not cover this song! First of all, it takes a while before anyone can realize that the hands are clapping at the same pace the song is playing. No, really? Check again! Holy moly, Kami's right, they are! Mind blowing! And who ARE those babies and kids?!? Morhdd, is that you?!? At 0:39, there's a "Jack's gonna be AAAAAA" (pause pause) "football staaar" aaaaaaand that's it! You gonna make us feel like we're watching a movie trailer, punk? What!? Then we realize.... This dude is all over the video!! FAKE! TROLL!! LALALALA!! Little jackass! Morhdd at it's finest, isn't it!? "You can hide my face, no one can tell it's the singer's hair! We'll be fine, everyone's got that hair cut these days!".... 2012 bro, bet you didn't expect THAT!!

So anyway, the little boy grew up and got to 14 years-old. What happened then? He got his copy-cat moves. He looks like some big players, but the elite knows he's got it from superiors, he's not inferior, but needs to make it better, yooo, he's a believer:




Alright man, I'm not going to say anything about the fact the beat is a copy-paste from The Police's "Every Breath You Take". This is about a fellow bro losing life, Notorious B.I.G., nothing to laugh about. Morhdd knows the meaning of what it means to be part of a guild like ours. This is proof of it; say what you want, he's one of us now. Although I have to say, that dance at 1:17 and 2:29? Not sure, broooo. But whatever you think of the song, black or white or any other color, you have to admit, that is one Hell of a dedicated song, and this is how I hope TST is bound!

So our little mischievous boy got to 21 years old without going to the police station (for too long) and this is what was playing when he came back (home from a random place):


Hey, we do love women with short hair, don't we?... Ohhh screw it, who am I kidding, we DON'T!! Note this women: WE DO NOT LIKE SHORT HAIR!!!!!! However we say we like it, we'd much prefer it long!!! Seriously!!! JESUS!!! ARRRGGGHH!!!! I don't even know this song!!! Bleh bleh bleh!!!

And there you have it, drunken half-passed-out Kami LIVE with Soundcheck!! Incredible!! Don't feel bad Morhdd, later would have resulted in the same songs, but not as strong comments about it....

This was Kami on Wednesday, March 7th, 3h42 in the morning, logging off for my drunken sleep. Gnight all, and hopefully Ghetto won't force me to do this again!

Stay tuned, as next week we get Ciciz, the one and only, Nargoth's official girlfriend (that's already giving you a lot of unnecessary info) on the most awful stage of all, Soundcheck's!

Cheers!!! *hic*

P.S. Mordhh, do you have ANY idea how intense your name is to type when drunk?!? HUH?!?! ANY?!?!?
I misspelled it all over the place! Had to come back and fix it when Ghetto double-checked... Shame on me...

Thursday, March 08, 2012

A Few Good Scum

Howdy, howdy. I need 2 scum to volunteer their... er, um... scumliness. I need a sitter starting ASAP for 1 week and another for the 15-18th. If you can do either of these, send me a message. If you have used our service before *stares at most scum* consider giving back to the scum collective by volunteering. Thanks,

Tofu

Decapitation Contest and results from last week


First a Brief message from our advertisers .....


Now back to our contest winners from last week! wait... another commercial...


ok ok ok no more commercials!!  Our winner is... drumroll please? 

Ghettoforce! with "wall of wonders!" and "wetness has its price"

Our runner up was Kamisama for going the ultimate mile with a Meme made!

YAY!!! --inserting a ton of cheering here-- Pick your prizes up at the door over there...

Now on to this weeks contest: lets see you put a caption to this!