Okay, it has been a while since the bards have visited with the goblinoid menace so you are probably getting tired of typing with your fingers crossed and the sheer number of candles that have been lit for him has long since passed into near epic quantities.
So, let us visit the latest information on that menace (currently mostly to himself) named Alyxyn.
As of three weeks ago, he sat up in bed as he was having trouble swallowing. He was rather surprised not to find either a small goblin, pet, or huge spider sitting on his next trying to end his life. Instead, what he found was that on the left side of his throat, there was a hard swelling between 1 and 2 inches in size. Before he could really think things through, it occurred to him that the town criers had lately been lamenting that the pollen counts in the air had reached largely uncountable levels, citing counts of 800+ when "dangerous" was barely 100. So.. He wasn't terribly worried, doubled his concoction to fight Mother Nature's assault upon him and went to sleep again.
However, when he awakened again, things had not gotten any better so the Menace sent some gold to a healer to reserve some time. Healer come and Healer go with no conclusion other than "yup, its something". Rituals were thrown and readings taken and again no conclusion could be derived. Finally further rituals and blood sacrifice was offered on another altar before the Priests could conclude that, while they still could not recognize the specific breed of 'whatever', that it was NOT good and that the swelling needed to be removed.
And now.. the waiting begins again. Now a special healer needs to be contracted to throw the Menace onto an altar and slice into his throat without removing his head.
When will this be? ..... sometime soon is all they can tell me currently.
Tuesday, June 21, 2016
Sunday, May 22, 2016
Blatherings from the Bilge
I am continuing to write this ooc as currently I am finding it hard to write terribly humourously and haven't had much 'spare' energy to do so I fear. And Now for the update:
On May 5th, I checked into the hospital and entered into surgerical procedures early as the docs wanted to use an epidural to lessen my pain levels. The epidural procedure went smoothly and I was off into medicated lands easily. This first procedure went well and I was slipped into a room to recover which I did apparently smoothly, emerging without Bladder and prostateless but with 40 staples running from my sternum downward.
On May 5th, I checked into the hospital and entered into surgerical procedures early as the docs wanted to use an epidural to lessen my pain levels. The epidural procedure went smoothly and I was off into medicated lands easily. This first procedure went well and I was slipped into a room to recover which I did apparently smoothly, emerging without Bladder and prostateless but with 40 staples running from my sternum downward.
Until about 1am May 7th.
At that time, while being moved in my bed, I felt something 'give' and shred in my abdomen. Due to procedures, nursing staff isnt permitted to remove surgical binding so, from that time until my doc came in around 10am I had issues. I hiccupped agonizingly every few seconds until I would pass out. After passing out, of course, the nursing staff would have to wake me from the bliss of painless oblivion to begin hiccupping again. Come 10am the doctor was able to check my wound and determined that my fascia had torn, in essence the muscles of my abdomen walls had torn around the staples. Emergency surgery ensued and I awakened hours later with more tubes emerging from my body than an elaborate Halloween costume, 30 new individual stitches and several sutures securing my abdominal wall.
Since that time, recovery has been slow but systematic with some odd fits and starts.
May 14th was a delightful day in which I was cut loose from the hospital and permitted to return home. Settling into home I am relearning parts of how to live and expectations to have for myself. Home Health is entering my life to assist in changes that are being necessary. Currently, for instance, sitting up for long periods (more than 15 min or so) can be be painful due to the folding of my abdomen.
On May 17 I visited the docs and they removed my lengthy list of staples and sutures. My wounds continue to drain well and at a 'healthy rate' and I basically wear a tight tension binder about my abdomen and chest (sort of like a corset). The idea is that if I sneeze, cough, hiccup or make other 'rather expected and violent' reactions of my chest, the binder should keep my abdomen from reinjuring while it slowly heals.
However, as is normal in the chronicle that has become my life, "it just doesn't end". Last night my wife was driving myself and our housemate to a large store to get fresh wound dressing supplies. when, at a stop light, we were rearended by a large pickup truck.
Police ensued and the other driver ended up being arrested for Driving Under the Influence and I ended up going to the nearest hospital. Despite being on Oxycodone, my head and neck and shoulder were hurting and.. we pretty much all felt it important that I be looked over to ensure no complications to my abdominal wounds had occurred due to the jarring impact.
Three hours of examinations and Xrays later, I was back home with a seriously strained right trapezius muscle (the big triangular muscle that connects the neck to the point of shoulder and downwards). This morning as I type this, it is pretty much a solid mass. No additional damage was done to my existing wounds but 2 doctors, 4 ER nurses, 2 police officers and Lord knows how many other medical staff got one of their first chances to see an 'almost new' chest stoma and my other wounds. I have gotten accustomed to sort of feeling like an animal on display at a zoo to a degree.
So.. that is the latest word. Feel free to ask questions as you have them if you do.
Wednesday, May 04, 2016
Blatherings from the Bilge
Okay.. doing this out of character just because.. well.. it is a bit easier right now ;)
As of midnight last night I started an all liquid diet to prepare for the surgery.
At 5am Pacific tomorrow May 5th, I check in for surgery in sunglasses, sombrero and packing a bottle of Patron for the surgical team.
At 7:30am they knock me out to start the ball rolling and the scoop and toss begins in which they remove parts of my anatomy to get ahead of the cancer.
By 2:30pm Pacific, if everything goes well, I should be waking up, stoned on pain meds, in my hospital room.
From that point, I will be in the hospital 5-7 days before release.
After release, there is a 6 week recovery period with an ETA for returning to my work on June 23rd.
Sometimes during this ordeal I will be upgraded from liquid diet to 'low residue' diet.. and eventually back to normal eating. Docs aren't willing to estimate that progression however so all your boots are probably safe for now.
I will have my tablet with me so you will see me in Shakes boobytrapping GBoss' throne to keep him honest and humble (yeah right.. I just like seeing him running around the guild with his pants on fire).
See you as I can!
Robert/Alyxyn
As of midnight last night I started an all liquid diet to prepare for the surgery.
At 5am Pacific tomorrow May 5th, I check in for surgery in sunglasses, sombrero and packing a bottle of Patron for the surgical team.
At 7:30am they knock me out to start the ball rolling and the scoop and toss begins in which they remove parts of my anatomy to get ahead of the cancer.
By 2:30pm Pacific, if everything goes well, I should be waking up, stoned on pain meds, in my hospital room.
From that point, I will be in the hospital 5-7 days before release.
After release, there is a 6 week recovery period with an ETA for returning to my work on June 23rd.
Sometimes during this ordeal I will be upgraded from liquid diet to 'low residue' diet.. and eventually back to normal eating. Docs aren't willing to estimate that progression however so all your boots are probably safe for now.
I will have my tablet with me so you will see me in Shakes boobytrapping GBoss' throne to keep him honest and humble (yeah right.. I just like seeing him running around the guild with his pants on fire).
See you as I can!
Robert/Alyxyn
Sunday, April 17, 2016
Blatherings from the Bilge
*the presenter walks into the auditorium slowly, quietly and makes his way to the podium. Standing for a moment in stage center, he takes and envelop from his vest pocket and takes out some papers that he lays on the stand before studying this audience.
Tapping the microphone once, twice, he looks against the glare of the lights out into the audience and clears his voice, causing massive feedback loops that tear through the auditorium before the sound crew wrangle it under control.
Clearing his voice again, the man addresses everyone, "good morning everyone and welcome to a status hearing on the wellbeing of the alternative reality being known as Alyxyn, aka,," and his lips curl in an obvious sneer of distaste "The Green Menace, aka The Two Foot Wonder, aka the Plotting Doom, aka The Retched Refuse".
Shuffling his paperwork a little, he continues "Official examination of the patient's anatomy has been performed by his Royal Highness, the ArchBishop Whodafuck and Pope Gunna Costia. These two personages and their staffs have determined that it shall indeed come to pass that the patient will need to lose some of his inner workings if the demonic infestation is to be purged. Amongst the organs to be lost is his bladder which had previously been blessed by Their Holy Touches as well as his prostate. Other organs may need to be Blessedly Delivered into His Light however Their Mutual Holinesses will have to determine that with direct observation..
Again shuffling his paperwork, he looks back to the auditorium into the lights and continues "currently His Holinesses have slated Their intervention work to begin at 5 am Pacific upon May 5th, that questionable 'holiday' of Mexican fame known as Cinco De Mayo. and work shall continue until either complete or the patient passes into The Light. Current expectations are that Their work shall be successful but be time consuming, taking Their morning and possibly afternoons."
"The Patie... erm.. Alyxyn.. shall remain in the facility of Their Holinesses for a period between 5 and 7 days, after which he shall be released to a care facility for a period approximating 6 weeks."
The presenter sets aside his notes and glares at his audience demandingly before he continues, "The Holinesses assure me that the patient WILL improve and get better. Of course if the Powers that Be dictate otherwise, it will come to pass as He wills it, as it Must Be."
With those words, the presenter adjusts his tie and steps back behind a curtain amidst an onslaught of shouted questions, camera flashes and one overly ripe tomato.
Now.. out of character
Yes, surgery is slated for May 5th. Check in is at 5am Pacific so I will be awake to ensure that I click in for fighting in the guild fight and in the portal before I am carried away.. Surgery won't likely start until after 7am or so however and is slated to take many hours. According to a friend of mine that had the same procedure performed on him, he didn't awaken until very late in the afternoon.
My family is going to be at the hospital with me, so you could say that a goblin horde will descend to lend some comfort, keeping in mind that the only one of the family (am one of four kids) that is shorter than six foot tall.. is my mother at barely five foot.. tall for goblins ;)
The hospital stay is expected to be five to seven days but I should have a tablet with me, though my current tablet decided to die dramatically last night. I will be hopped on pain killers but I should at least manage my checkins. After I am released from the hospital, recovery is expected to take 6 weeks before I can think about going back to work. During this time, my incisions will be healing and I will be learning how to use tubing to replicate what Nature had previously permitted me to perform.
I will be in pain, but medicated. I have been going through bouts of depression that are rather monsoonic (if that is a word) but I learned how to weather those years ago. Generally what I do is pull into myself until I can Center myself and return to functioning.
Before the May 5th surgery I have several appointments within the health care industry of the US, meeting with anesthesia personnel, talking to an ostomy specialist, etc. I also have to remember to get a bottle of Patron to give to the surgical staff so that they may celebrate the holiday once their day is over and I am tucked away in a recovery room.
Sorry it has been a few days since getting to this point but you can likely imagine it takes time to 'process' the loss of body parts, much less the ability to pee upon your own, but living is what is matter.. until one day it may not. Quality of Life matters more than Quantity to me but I am a solid Survivor.
Best thoughts and wishes to all my treasured Scum.
Tapping the microphone once, twice, he looks against the glare of the lights out into the audience and clears his voice, causing massive feedback loops that tear through the auditorium before the sound crew wrangle it under control.
Clearing his voice again, the man addresses everyone, "good morning everyone and welcome to a status hearing on the wellbeing of the alternative reality being known as Alyxyn, aka,," and his lips curl in an obvious sneer of distaste "The Green Menace, aka The Two Foot Wonder, aka the Plotting Doom, aka The Retched Refuse".
Shuffling his paperwork a little, he continues "Official examination of the patient's anatomy has been performed by his Royal Highness, the ArchBishop Whodafuck and Pope Gunna Costia. These two personages and their staffs have determined that it shall indeed come to pass that the patient will need to lose some of his inner workings if the demonic infestation is to be purged. Amongst the organs to be lost is his bladder which had previously been blessed by Their Holy Touches as well as his prostate. Other organs may need to be Blessedly Delivered into His Light however Their Mutual Holinesses will have to determine that with direct observation..
Again shuffling his paperwork, he looks back to the auditorium into the lights and continues "currently His Holinesses have slated Their intervention work to begin at 5 am Pacific upon May 5th, that questionable 'holiday' of Mexican fame known as Cinco De Mayo. and work shall continue until either complete or the patient passes into The Light. Current expectations are that Their work shall be successful but be time consuming, taking Their morning and possibly afternoons."
"The Patie... erm.. Alyxyn.. shall remain in the facility of Their Holinesses for a period between 5 and 7 days, after which he shall be released to a care facility for a period approximating 6 weeks."
The presenter sets aside his notes and glares at his audience demandingly before he continues, "The Holinesses assure me that the patient WILL improve and get better. Of course if the Powers that Be dictate otherwise, it will come to pass as He wills it, as it Must Be."
With those words, the presenter adjusts his tie and steps back behind a curtain amidst an onslaught of shouted questions, camera flashes and one overly ripe tomato.
Now.. out of character
Yes, surgery is slated for May 5th. Check in is at 5am Pacific so I will be awake to ensure that I click in for fighting in the guild fight and in the portal before I am carried away.. Surgery won't likely start until after 7am or so however and is slated to take many hours. According to a friend of mine that had the same procedure performed on him, he didn't awaken until very late in the afternoon.
My family is going to be at the hospital with me, so you could say that a goblin horde will descend to lend some comfort, keeping in mind that the only one of the family (am one of four kids) that is shorter than six foot tall.. is my mother at barely five foot.. tall for goblins ;)
The hospital stay is expected to be five to seven days but I should have a tablet with me, though my current tablet decided to die dramatically last night. I will be hopped on pain killers but I should at least manage my checkins. After I am released from the hospital, recovery is expected to take 6 weeks before I can think about going back to work. During this time, my incisions will be healing and I will be learning how to use tubing to replicate what Nature had previously permitted me to perform.
I will be in pain, but medicated. I have been going through bouts of depression that are rather monsoonic (if that is a word) but I learned how to weather those years ago. Generally what I do is pull into myself until I can Center myself and return to functioning.
Before the May 5th surgery I have several appointments within the health care industry of the US, meeting with anesthesia personnel, talking to an ostomy specialist, etc. I also have to remember to get a bottle of Patron to give to the surgical staff so that they may celebrate the holiday once their day is over and I am tucked away in a recovery room.
Sorry it has been a few days since getting to this point but you can likely imagine it takes time to 'process' the loss of body parts, much less the ability to pee upon your own, but living is what is matter.. until one day it may not. Quality of Life matters more than Quantity to me but I am a solid Survivor.
Best thoughts and wishes to all my treasured Scum.
Thursday, April 07, 2016
Blatherings from the Bilge
Well I don't have the energy to add this information into my IC version of my story of my cancer so I will just post here what I have posted to my family and to my work teams.
well got back from the doctor and here is what he has to say..
1) the cancer is back (this we knew)
2) the cancer is just as aggressive as before (this we knew)
3) the cancer that they are able to see not only is in some of the areas that were previously resected but also in some of the pristine areas that had not yet been touched by it.
4) no lymph nodes currently involved (yay) so no PET necessary (yay) but that means no glowing in the dark (pout)
so here is what everyone has been waiting for.. next steps:
1) it is possible to re-resect my bladder and run me through another set of BCG treatments like they had but...
but.. chances are good that if they did that, the cancer would outgrow their ability to contain it so...
2) bladder has to go
3) placement of cancer is such that bladder AND prostate will need to go (I will let you all look up THOSE side effects as I don't want to dwell on them right now in particular)
4) with those organs gone, they will reroute the ureters that connect the kidneys to the bladder so that they will run into a small 'rerouting' that would use a section of my colon that they would have to create. This would basically lead outward to a spout on my lower abdomen so that my urine would flow down and out into a bag.
ETA.. roughly 3 weeks after I give the docs the go-ahead to schedule things
end result.. roughly a week in the hospital followed by approximately 6 weeks of downtime healing around home before I would 'feel up to moving about a lot'.
So.. time for me to process, mourn, and whatever else and however else this is going to hit me with in the next little bit.. but.. not really up to talking a whole lot as you can likely imagine.
well got back from the doctor and here is what he has to say..
1) the cancer is back (this we knew)
2) the cancer is just as aggressive as before (this we knew)
3) the cancer that they are able to see not only is in some of the areas that were previously resected but also in some of the pristine areas that had not yet been touched by it.
4) no lymph nodes currently involved (yay) so no PET necessary (yay) but that means no glowing in the dark (pout)
so here is what everyone has been waiting for.. next steps:
1) it is possible to re-resect my bladder and run me through another set of BCG treatments like they had but...
but.. chances are good that if they did that, the cancer would outgrow their ability to contain it so...
2) bladder has to go
3) placement of cancer is such that bladder AND prostate will need to go (I will let you all look up THOSE side effects as I don't want to dwell on them right now in particular)
4) with those organs gone, they will reroute the ureters that connect the kidneys to the bladder so that they will run into a small 'rerouting' that would use a section of my colon that they would have to create. This would basically lead outward to a spout on my lower abdomen so that my urine would flow down and out into a bag.
ETA.. roughly 3 weeks after I give the docs the go-ahead to schedule things
end result.. roughly a week in the hospital followed by approximately 6 weeks of downtime healing around home before I would 'feel up to moving about a lot'.
So.. time for me to process, mourn, and whatever else and however else this is going to hit me with in the next little bit.. but.. not really up to talking a whole lot as you can likely imagine.
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