Scumbase

With a loud squeak of "Hi Ho Geiko!" the Green Menace comes in riding a small mottled lizard who is strapped into a saddle and harness. Scurrying about on the floor, the Green Menace rides the small gecko in amongst the legs of the tables and barstools in the room before laughing loudly and heading for the AllPunishing GBrain's throne.

A hearty "giddemup" echoes minisculy through the bar as the gecko's surface grabbing feet start the pair up GBrain's boot, then knee and scurry ever upwards despite the Despot's wild dance-like gyrations to dislodge them. In a burst of speed and agility, the gecko leaps from the points of GBoss' head as if it was a diving board, flinging it across the space to the bulletin board.

As the gecko spreads its feet wide to take the impact, its rider throws out a playing card, the Duece of Clubs to smack onto the bulletin board, followed momentarily by the Green Menace triumphantly sinking a dart into the board as if planting a flag on the top of a mountain but pinning the card with the dart.

The gecko scampering along the wall sideways, the goblin holds on for his life as he calls out a 'alalalalalalalalalalala' before ducking into a large rat hole and disappearing.

As the echo dies down and the quiet resumes, broken only by bellowing snores, the card remains in the gloom with the following notations in itty bitty eye straining script:

"wahl ya'll its been a mostly quiet week. We dun got lost in de dunjon with de boss rolling da Q into a pit unexpectedly. With the next attempt, Q ended up playing handball with de dunjon boss before da guy tripped him up un bounced him offah da wall a few times."

"Uthahwise we be flirtin with an honah hole between numbah 1 un numbah 3 in which weez too fah betwixt fer uz tah git nuttin from Endless witout winning nor frum numbah 3 even wit us winnin.

"Fer dis week's Buthday Bashin, ahr leadah (fearful o only AAylia and Revi) GBoss dun got 280, Geekster and Woopydoo hit 290, Zimmah dun popped ovah 260, MasterDoDo hit 230, Oswalt un Turducken both snagged 220 un srike hit 200.

"As achiefemunts, Gregor Clegane un Usty both dun got 3 lebels last week. Dis contribooted tah a total growth o 55 levels in a week which iz nuttin to sneeze at

"Da 95% club holds steady at 26 members (52%) un lotsa pipples been puttin in dere time tah move inta it. Top o de heap wuz CrusaderBin at 2.76. Following him, AAylia slathered 2.24% of her book to join da pahtah 95% club. Behind her.. probably fascinated by the view of her behind.. came TDI with 1.76. Scrubby put in 1.24 un MaxPower put in 1.12, Da restah da scum cum in at less den effen .50%"

"In uthah werds.. cummon ya'll.. git yer checkin back up dere so we do bettah. Also de big Boss be lukin fer new officeers so start mailin him early un oftin witcher volunteerin."

Week ending Feb 19, 2012